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February 10, 2006
Kaleo Conference on Gender and the Church: Chapel Address
The Kaleo Conference on Gender and the Church is going on this weekend at Covenant College, with Frank and Carolyn James as the featured speakers. I have notes.
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"Masculinity"
Chapel Address by Frank James, President, RTS Orlando
Covenant College
Friday, February 10, 2006
Speaking from the perspective of an elder in a reformed church, Frank James explored the idea of Christian masculinity. (He also mentioned that he considered himself capable of speaking on the topic of masculinity since he is, in fact, a Texan.) Numerous lives, he said, have been ruined by a false understanding of what it means to be a Christian man.
In his early years as an elder, six couples in his relatively small church came in for counseling and, eventually, got divorced. The most painful and telling experience involved a former elder who claimed that his wife was "not submissive" while she argued that he was "a tyrant." Eventually, through the tearful testimony of the couple's daughter, the elder board realized that they all, James included, had been functioning on the assumption that the husband was right. They realized, James said, that as elders they had some unrealized gender issues.
In his years of counseling, James has seen a pattern: it was always the wife who initiated the counseling or divorce proceedings, always the husband that opposed or saw "no reason" to do so, and always the wife that pushed forward. Gender, James says, is very often at the center of how men and women relate in marriage. "Gender is not a theoretical question. It touches us where we live everyday." In many cases, it is rooted in a misconception of masculinity. Men seem to think that, as men, they need not take their wives' feelings or ideas seriously. In many counseling sessions, the common refrain from the husbands is, "I don't know what the fuss is about."
James explained that after reading many books on Christianity and gender and pouring over the Scripture passages generally associated with gender, he found an unexpected passage that jumped out at him: Galatians 5:22, 23. The Fruit of the Spirit. This, he says, is what the Christian man should be like. He should show love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, and self-control. The Fruit of the Spirit must inform our Christian understanding of masculinity and femininity. The call of Christ precedes the call as a male (or female). Thus, "who you are as a Christian must inform how you act as a male or female." The Fruit of the Spirit are not "feminine" qualities. When men read this passage, they often skim past traits such as "kindness" and "gentleness," but, James challenged, "you are not less of a man if you are kind and gentle."
James then focused on a view of Christian masculinity with which he disagrees but sees as gaining steam in the reformed community. An "unnamed" pastor wrote an "unnamed" book that purports: "the evangelical church has been feminized." The corrective to this "feminization" is a recovery of "the hardness of masculinity." Men are called to assert their authority and never before and enforce their will on their wives. James argued, however, that such a view is incompatible with Paul's list in Galatians 5. "I do not think 'hardness' is a Christian virtue."
He ended with charges to the young men and young women. He encouraged the men -- who are, at this time in their lives fixing their self-identity --
to embrace the virtues of Galatians 5:22, 23. He reminded the women that their own conceptions of masculinity has "huge implications on the kind of men you will marry" and challenged them to shape their expectations according to Galatians 5:22, 23. He concluded: "marriage may be where gender matters most."
Culture, Yo , Faith , Woman, Woman, Woah-man | By elissa | 03:02 PM
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Comments
The speaker said "...you are not less of a man if you are kind and gentle."
I would go one step farther. If you are not kind and gentle, you are not displaying the Fruit of Christ, and are not connected to the Vine Christ. Consequently you are not a true, fruitful Christian person and can never be a true man or woman if you do not display kindess and gentleness (along with the other fruit of obedience, of course--the ones listed in this passage, and the others all throughout the Scripture).
Posted by: Krista at February 11, 2006 12:20 AM
